Bringing up a child has been identified as one of the most challenging tasks. The onus of shaping a bright future for the child falls on the shoulders of the parents. Parents have to endure many sleepless nights to ensure that their baby sleeps peacefully. Parenting is a huge responsibility and entails making several compromises. The task of parenting becomes even more challenging when a single parent has to take up the responsibility of nurturing a child.
The thought that there is no support system except you to help in bringing up the child can be quite intimidating for a single parent. Nonetheless you cannot run from your responsibility irrespective of the reason for the absence of the other parent. But if you are determined and if your affection towards your baby is true, you can overcome this herculean challenge and fulfil your responsibility as a successful and caring parent.
Below are some tips which can help you in the process of bringing up a child if you are a single parent. But before you go through the pointers, keep this in mind that your faith in your parenting abilities is inevitable for anything to work out. If you are firm and truly believe that you on your own can nurture your baby and give him a bright future, all your efforts will reap you favourable rewards and your child will see you as a successful parent.
Accept the Responsibility
Single parenting has its own share of advantages and drawbacks. If you are a single parent, you need to accept the truth that the responsibility of your child having an optimistic future rests on your shoulders entirely. Since you are alone to take care of the needs of your child, you will have to compromise in certain areas. You cannot ignore your child and indulge in your own pleasures.
But looking at the brighter side of it, you will have more time to spend with your child and create a stronger bond. You can spend your weekends and holidays with your child on a vacation, or some fun activities like dancing, singing, etc. When you forgo your opportunity of socializing with friends and instead spend time with your kid, make sure that you don’t regret this and embrace every minute spent with your child as a golden moment.
Single parents often experience the problem of indiscipline in kids. Many a times, single parents in order to compensate for the absence of the second parent, give in to the whims of their child and make them spoiled. Giving your child free rein can prove disastrous for him. You need to be careful in your approach towards disciplining your child. Strike a chord between being a strict disciplinarian and an overly lenient friend. Mould your approach as per the situation. If your child is behaving boisterously and is not paying heed to your demands, you need to impose some strict rules of behaviour and conduct on your child.
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Resorting to physical punishment is not the only option. You can ground your child for a week or take away his rewards. Make sure that your efforts aimed at disciplining your child do not make him rebellious. Never become too easy and lenient with your child.
Your child might be going through a tough phase and might be missing his other parent. If your child is mature enough to understand the intricacies of your past relationship, it is time to tell your child the truth about the missing parent. Don’t use your child as a vent for your rage and grudges. Instead be true and honest with your child and confide about the problems you faced. If your child talks about the other parent, be polite and understanding.
If you are planning to give your life another chance by getting involved with someone else, make sure that you don’t keep this as a secret from your child. And while deciding about your future with someone else, don’t forget to take into consideration the wish of your child.
Give Freedom of Choice to Your Child
You might be over-protective about your child especially due to your status as a single parent. However you must not let your insecurities and fears hinder the development of your child. Let your kid make his own choices in certain matters. Give your child the freedom of choice in matters where he is capable of deciding for himself.
Be a Friend
Your child might be going through tough times due to the absence of the second parent. If you are a friend to your child, your child will be able to confide in you and share his problems with you. Let your child know that you are there for him and would listen to him without making any judgements. Be a patient listener and a friend to your child.
Make your child feel at ease while talking to you. If you feel that your child is finding it difficult to open up with you, you can initiate a conversation by sharing events from your schedule. Gradually your child will open up with you. Ask your child to bring his friends home so that you have an idea about his peer group. Take care that your child does not mingle with people of the wrong sort.
You need not shoulder the entire responsibility of caring after your child on your own. Take the help of the child’s grandparents, family members and your friends. The task will become much easier if you have help at hand. Let others take certain responsibilities and help you in tasks related to the bringing up of a child.
These days you can also participate in single parent forums which can help you in dealing with fears associated with single parenting. In such forums you get a chance to meet up with other single parents and ascertain how they deal with the challenges of single parenting.
Single Parenting might seem as a difficult task in the beginning but your faith and persistence can help you in overcoming the challenges and become the ‘perfect parent’ for your child.